Tuesday, November 29, 2005


If only the things worked out the way they could not work out the country I was born in would celebrate it`s 63rd birthday. But still...about dead all the best.The bad things we forget...and just keep sweet memories of something that is gone and unrepeatable. That for....in my memory stays one huge, beutifull country, one "homeland" one spirit.
Happy birthday Yugoslavia!!!!

Sunday, November 27, 2005

At the birthplace of DEMOCRACY

What is democracy? Is it that thing that western people try to teach us? Is it that little thing that they took from one antient civilization that once existed somewhere in mediranian? Or it is something else? If we`re talking about that democracy we should explain it other way. Let me try to say how I see that type of democracy. It is thirany covered all around with huge letters DEMOCRACY, but if you are somehow able to look under beneath that...you will se just tirany. Somehow..this weird thing coulb be called that name...but only if we under term DEMOS understand FEW people that hold (KPATANE) the power and do what ever they want it.

Well guys....today i spent one beautifull day in the birthplace of democracy. Not the one I had been talking abowe, but in the birthpace of TRUE, REAL, PURE and SACRED DEMOCRACY. Democracy that gave everything best to us, and now three to five tousand years after, we are still trying to achieve that very same, basic and uncomplicated democracy. Is it so hard? I don`t think so...but would others (that hold the power) liked it? I don`t think so. This little post is dedicated to the people that seek for clean democracy, for free society, for sacreed freedom.
Walking around and understanding where are you, seeing all you wanted to see for your entire life...beeing at the very same place where apostle Paulus said to the Athinains "O men of Athens" looking the spot of birth of European christanity...leaves me nothing else than specheles. That for there is no need for talking. Just scilence and absolute respect.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Friday, November 11, 2005


Kafana (sr.кафана) is an holy institution in Serbia. If you would ask me how to present you original Serbia, I would just take you to one Kafana where you could see Serbia in act. Some Kafanas even have their own laws and constitutions. For example, MY Kafana (the one I like to go the most) is like my own home. Still weven in your home there are same laws that you need to obbaid. So I will present you some of the rooles you must not forget in case you deacide to go to Kafana. (once again Kafana is writen with K cause it is institution)

preparation rooles for going to Kafana


To Kafana you never MUST go alone. Kafana is an social institution where you need to present your own friends, meet other people, and present your self ( by presenting your friends) to the person you are meeting (as well with it`s friends). That is the best way to meet the REAL person the way it is, the way it acts among it`s best friends.


To Kafana you never go with your empy pockets. If you know that your party does not have enough money in it`s Kafana budget (even though they will say: "Come on...we`ll managge somehow")....don`t go. The best excuse (and the one everyeone will understand is_ " I just can`t!" (that is the universal antiKafana language)

Entering the Kafana- rooles


By entering the Kafana..you need to take good care what song is on. (if it`s the song you like the most, you enter Kafana with your hands in the air that meens...I REALLY LOVE YOU ALL")


You allways look for the table at the best position ( near by weithers and orchestra). The best of all is if you are able to sit in the corner where from you can see the doors...and wave any time someone you know enters....(and someone you don`t wonna see...you just get down under the table)


You need to be ready to understand the rools of drinkin in Kafana. Even though kafana has the Coffee thing in it`s name...in most of `em...you will just not find Coffee...(it`s underground name for Alcohol)


You need to be ready to stand huge dose of Alcohol in your blood if you are going to Kafana. Drink slowly...not like beast....cause you will not be able to fulfill "after Kafana laws" so take care.

After Kafana laws


Do not drive your car after getting out of Kafana. The enemy (in further text Police) is everywhere and he`s just waiting to get you when you are most woundable.
So...the best option is just to forget that you came by your car, sit in taxy and get home. (You will think tomorrow with your headache where your car is and what Kafana you went to...if you are not able to remember the exact postition of your car, call friends from your Kafana party...someone will be able to remember).


Since the enemy is everywhere...you must sing on your way home (but never go in the middle of Street, because enemy will get you) Be discreet...and do not draw too much atention to your self.


Entering your home...if you feel sick...do not go to bed. You need toi puke, because that`s the only way you have good night with out feeling that you are falling down to the middle of Earth! If you can`t puke.....there are some professional ,well trained ways and procedures you need to know. I will not tell you about it....find your own way.

So...there are the basic rooles....

Dedicated to someone.


Sunday, November 06, 2005


First time after 14 years i deacied to make that step and to come to my holy Mountine...since i could not go to the one in Greece. I deacided to come to my homeland and to bowe in front of the graves of my grandparents that had been killed by the croatians 14 years ago. I came to the region where my roots are...where my origins are...where I AM. where I am from..where i belong....and everything that i saw...just reminded me of my life, complete disorder and destruction. I felt like man with out land on my own land. Man with out homw in MY onw home...destroyed, abandoned and left to the time and history, left to someone else who will never understand how is it like to be like I am, how is it like to feel that roots and this blood that is still runing trough my venes. I love ho i am, and now after I saw all that the way it is now, i deacided to make my life worth. I have spoken with some old people there in the village of my grandparents...it is joy to see some new and young face among them...it is joy to see that that family did not dye with those two slaugtered old people....but instead...that WE LIVE....more than ever...better then ever...and prouder than even. I am more prouded on my self now..than ever in my entire life, and today I made the decision that my life will change from it rots, that not just for my sake, but for the sake of the that old people that looked in my face with the hope in change, with the wish regaring my sucess....not just for my self...but for all of them that still, even after 14 years suffer....
I am crying at this momment when I am writhing this. It is not simple at all to come to your land, to your grandparents graves...not even beeing able to find them in all that grass an weed....shame...i felt like peace of shit...that i abandoned them...even though...dead mouth can not speak....but that`s why I am here....to tell you this story....TO SPEAK IT LOUD...SO ENTIRE WORLD COULD HEAR MY PAIN....MY SHAME AND MY PROUD. I am proud that I am the first one that i came....i am proud that I have been the first one that lighted the wax candle (instead all that stupid roman-catholic white ones) on my grandparents grave...that i had been able to sing to them, eonia i mnimi...got give them piece.....cause...they are not forgoten...they are in my memory...and till the day I will separate from this life..they will not be forgoten.....
Today I heard about some of the last moments of my grandma`s life....I just kept crying....cause...it is my blood...and i know that I would be like that....PROUD till the moment my body will be layed down in the could earth! Thank you grandma for giving me that strength....
Sorry people...but this effected on my personality...it is not easy to see all those houses...destroyed by barbaric flame.....it is not easy to see the Church that I have been baptised at....that it doesn`t exist any more.....my roots tryied to be ripped out, but I sware...till my last breath...I will not forget it...untill there is strenght in my damned body...I will never give up on who I am...and why I am what I am...the only thing I know...is that I will be proud....as i am now.....And I hope that day by day...i will be even prouder and happyer...and smarter...learning from the death mouth...and graves of my ancestors!!!!!
God save the martyrian serbian people...that went trough all this pain and misery just for your sake...and for your Holy name!!!
Listen to my pryer, cause I know you are the only rigth...and eternal Justice and punishent!!! God have mercy on me!